Virgin No More

Virgin No More

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Virgin no more. I don’t intend to deceive you into something perverted or even disappoint you of your preconceived idea about this article’s topic. There is nothing sexually related to it, don’t worry. What I meant about this is that I just lost my lesbian cherry for the second time by attending an openly gay and lesbian party in Manila. My first was an exclusive party way back in Cebu (It wasn’t that uncomfortable because I was freely conversing in my own dialect with fellow lesbians). This second time around was seriously uncomfortable for me. I should have been a more animalistic homo sapien. Relating to the guys in Big Bang theory television series, I just realized now that I need to go out more often from my rainbow thinking shell. Not just the feeling of discomfort but also the challenge of conversing to people in their own medium of language, Tagalog. Don’t be surprise if I tend to act mute during a conversation not because of the language barrier but also I have this habit of being lazy in talking. Now, let me point out my unbiased observations in a party jam packed with lesbians and gays.

As I stepped on and walked towards the vicinity, I observed that there were plenty of women in a Gothic themed choice of fashion with an estimate of almost 4 or even 5 inches sharp pointed pumps, which you don’t want to mess with believe me, you might end up with deep organ punctures in the hospital. If you plan to attend this kind of party, you need to learn the art of balance first. It would be an embarrassment if you trample wearing it and worst case scenario would be falling on the floor which means the end of the world, go buy another face. (unless you have this bad ass attitude of bouncing back and regaining such poise, then go I’ll support you). Anyhow, I am not sure if this is the style of fashion among lesbians during a party or I just don’t have any fashion sense or even sense?

My advice for those curious women who are planning to experience such event is that they should start hoarding Gothic themed apparels and accessories. Also, it isn’t just Gothic themed wears but also clothes that are intended to arouse people (You read it right “arouse”, because since we are in the age of scarcity, save the earth by wearing almost nothing). It is a good idea because it won’t only make the earth happy but also everyone happy, in an economic non-perverted perspective. Before I forget, a good investment in painting materials for the face or simply called make – up is a good way to express such creativity and looking good despite the lighting condition in the dance floor though.(Disclaimer: I don’t know what I am talking about anymore).

From fashion, let us jump into the dating and flirting scenes during my chameleon spy mode in the party. I actually don’t know how to dance despite my willingness to dance because I don’t want them to think I am heavily possessed on the dance floor. If only I had the talent of having a harmonious relationship with both of my feet that they can follow orders, I guess, they have this mind of its own and that leaves me helpless, powerless even. While I was looking around while pretending to be a decoration on the wall, I observed that if women were demoted to a mere animal, I could pinpoint which ones are the tiger, lion, and the wolf (they are the ones who jump from one group to another, the extrovert types). They are the ones who talk a lot (which in my end doesn’t make sense). A typical scenario such as this:

Extrovert Person A walks toward the crowd, smiling, with one bottle in her hand and cigarette in the other. She placed her bottle on the table, took a puff with her cigarette and released the devil’s smoke with such pleasure.

She opens up and says, “Hey! what’s up?”.
One of the crowd would respond, “Dude, I am getting drunk”.
Laughing, she replies, “That’s okay! I’ve been drinking too but I am not yet drunk.”

After this, gossiping or flirting conversation assumes. If it doesn’t click, Person A would jump into another group and a series of repetition would then occur.

I guess this whole process doesn’t interest me. It is quite predictable and boring. I am not sure if I want to go to the same experience all over again. I am not gaining. I am just spending my time for nothing. (I know. I need a life.) Please shoot me but then I would love to have an intellectually orgasmic conversation sometimes. Like something that could give you a challenge or somehow makes you think.

Overall, I am glad to experience taking a peek into the other side of the lesbian world. It gives me more perspectives which help me understand the life I chose to live and lead. I would want to learn more about this kind of world so I would have a smoother journey to self-actualization. For now, I just want to share this kind of experience to everyone. I hope this serves as a tidbits about lesbian life.

I'm currently working in intensive care, where I handle most cases of post liver transplants and liver disease. Other than that, I like hanging out at the library, just being a total nerd all the time.


  1. I don’t mean to indulge your sentiment but I do get your statement below.

    “Please shoot me but then I would love to have an intellectually orgasmic conversation sometimes. Like something that could give you a challenge or somehow makes you think.”

      • whether in a bar or coffee shop, no difference anymore with the noise. I’m drawn watching people on how they converse. Nowadays, I find them just waiting for the other to finish their sentence so they can begin theirs. Its almost comical. And sad..

        • Hehe. I totally agree with you. I just space out… auto bot switch turned on. I actually don’t like talking that much unless if it is necessary… I always have that autistic moments. Hmm I guess we have to find people who we are comfortable with based in interests, perspectives and ideas.

  2. My first exclu party was in, guess where? Cebu… I was nervous I didn’t know what to expect. I was in a middle of my soul-searching back then and I was wondering, what the heck am I doin here??! Nevertheless, I had fun… Observing. Doing some action a lil bit, but not participating that much and ended up among the last one to leave home. I struck a conversation with this Manileña tourist who was also going through some issues but for the most part of the conversation, I’m unable to recall due to alcohol intoxication until I realized that the bar was almost empty!

    • Hehe. Well what matters most is that you had fun! As for me, I am not built for parties because I am not the aggressive type or the outgoing type. I admit the nerdiness in me. I rather stay at home and laugh my ass off watching “big bang theory” hehe. I love drinking though… 😀

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